Full of emotions

Posted by Sarah on May 31, 2010 in Uncategorized

Wow, what a day I’ve had. We had an appointment at an autism specific primary school this morning, the one that is going to be moving locally to us and expanding to include a high school. Beth had a curriculum day today so I thought it would be a good opportunity for her to meet some of the other kids in her year level. My hope was that if I got known that I’d be kept in the loop about the proposed timeline of the new building. I also hoped in a way that Beth would really like the school and I could ask if she could transition over the next couple of years. We had decided that Beth could repeat grade 5 next year, that way if the school wasn’t ready by 2012 as expected then we’d have an extra year up our sleeves as they will only take them from year 7. Well so much for preconceived ideas!

Beth was in full flight when we first went in, running into the principals office while I was signing us in the book. I ran in after her but thought to myself that it was a good thing, showing her autistic side can only help our cause. The lady we saw was lovely. I stated my case and got the same answer as on the phone. They still aren’t sure about dates and exactly what year level they will be catering to. The explanation made me believe that people higher up were the ones actually calling the shots. I was told that how many kids they were catering to was dependant on if they could get the staff they needed. Now if that was me organising it I would be putting out ads everywhere urging people to start a new career, letting them know that there would be jobs available in 18 months. It just didn’t seem to make sense and I got the feeling that she knew it too.

I was then told that the year Beth was born – 1999 – meant that not only would repeating grade 5 be pointless, than in fact by their criteria she should in fact be in grade 6 this year, therefore not able to go into year 7 in 2012. At this point I burst into tears. She was very understanding and passed me a box of tissues that I’m sure has been replaced countless times. I apologized and said that I guess she’d got used to it by now to which she kindly replied that she never gets used to it. She then went on to tell me that because Beth does not have an intellectual disability that she wouldn’t qualify for the school anyway. I told her how ridiculous this was as I know of at least 2 children who have a mild intellectual disability who are much more able than Beth is and much more independant. This was punctuated by lots of nose blowing and ugly crying so didn’t quite have the impact that I would have liked! She did agree however that there are more and more higher functioning kids like Beth who haven’t got anywhere to go.

I, pardon my french, felt like absolute shit when I left there. Beth hadn’t wanted to go to start with but when she saw the playground she got quite excited and we didn’t end up even looking around. I felt like a dog with my tail between my legs. Bev and John had had the other kids for me and we talked about it when we got home. They have suggested writing to the education department which I will do but I don’t think it will do us any good at this late stage. They’ll say that they are building the school as promised and really, they are aren’t they? We are at the start of the autism epidemic that seems to be out there at the moment. By the time my Bill starts high school there will be so much more in place but we only have 18 months. Even the fact that they wonder if they will be ready in 2012 is amazing really. It’s an existing building. You could build a new bloody school in that time! Things like this move so slowly.

I don’t begrudge the younger kids out there with the Faschia funding and all the new avenues with Early Intervention but hey, we’re here too! We got 20 subsidised visits which we gratefully accepted and used in one year. When looking on the government website theres a whole lot there for autistic kids in this years budget but the majority of it is to do with Early Intervention. There is some to educate schools in teaching autism which is fabulous but not much else for the older kids. The government don’t seem to realise that if they don’t want these kids to be a burden on society as they get older then they need to help them now. Or do they think it’s too late for the over pre school aged ones. It’s like they’re the forgotten ones and it’s pissing me off.

Anyway off my soapbox. I’m thinking more calmly now and thinking of plan B. I’ve written to our principal and asked her about the assessments and how they will help us if we can end up getting into this school. If not, I’m going to approach whichever my chosen high school will be and ask about doing part time schooling. The way it’s meant to work is that they get funded for part of the time that they’re at school and they use this for the main and only subjects that they do. The rest of the time they are supervised in a special needs common room and complete homework from these subjects. My concern is Beth having to find her way to this room and her classrooms unaided. I thought that I could suggest that she could come home when she is not aided in a classroom. This way I can still partially home school her. I still get a break and she still gets socialisation and an education. It’s a win win as far as I’m concerned. My main concern is how the funding would work. If she got it for a percentage of her time then they may cut it when she’s not there. It can’t hurt to ask though.

We ended the day well. Beth had a swimming lesson and was in fine form. She did some excellent work with Caprice and made me laugh so much with one of her loopholes that I thought I’d end my post on a happy note. Caprice told Beth that she could choose a somersault or a handstand, only one, when she did a really good lap. Beth of course did both. When Caprice called her on it Beth told her that she had said that she could in fact to a somerstand! The combination made it that she could in fact do both. Caprice and I both burst out laughing. She’s such a funny girl!


Happy Birthday to my beautiful niece

Posted by Sarah on May 27, 2010 in Uncategorized

I’ve had a lovely day today. After dropping the kids off I popped into Dr Robin for an osteo appointment then picked up my niece Ali and took her to Knox to shop as it’s her 18th Birthday today.

We shopped around and bought her a lovely ring that she picked out. I wanted her to pick something herself as jewellery is always a dodgy thing to choose for other people. We then went to Hogs Breath for lunch. (Shhh don’t tell my kids, it’s their favourite place!) Ali’s such a gorgeous girl and really has her head screwed on the right way, I really enjoy her company. 

One of the things we chatted about over lunch is the problem that I have with Beth about her getting her period. I bought her a little locket to put photos of her as a little girl and her now in to show her how she’s growing up. When on the hags weekend we were discussing this and one of the other mums came up with a great idea. As Beth’s stock standard answer is that she wants to be a Powerpuff girl I am going to write a social story that includes them in it. It can be about how one of them gets her period and how the other girls are really jealous because it’s such an exciting time for her. I could even include the locket in the story, saying that only girls with their periods get these lockets. Hopefully that will work in a positive way, instead of making Beth not want to watch the Powerpuff girls anymore.

Ali offered to help too which would be a great benefit. She said she would talk to Beth about when she started her period and how excited she was. Beth loves her big cousin and would love the chance to sit and have a chat with her. Ali said she could suggest they go shopping for a purse to put her pads in and tell her that once Beth gets her period then it means that they can do something special together like go and watch a movie.

It’s such a hard thing because the honest truth is that it is a horrible thing to have to go through and at times it does hurt but unfortunately it’s something that is unavoidable. I want to make it as positive an experience as I can. Hopefully all of this will help.

We’ve had a fairly good week this week. Tuesday night Beth was up late again though. It was after 11 when she went to sleep. She’s been having a few really early wake ups again too. I guess the body gets used to the melatonin. I’m loathe to take her off it though as it might mean even later nights. I’m not sure what time it was last night but it’s my turn again tonight so I’ll see how she goes tonight.

I’ve got an appointment at Wantirna Heights Primary School on Monday. It’s a school just for autistic kids and it’s the one that will be relocating and extending into a high school. It’s a curriculum day at our school so I’m taking Bethie with me. I figure if I get my head in the school at least they’ll know who I am when I hound them to take Beth! They don’t have waiting lists yet for the high school but hopefully if I keep in contact we’ll be on one when they get it. I asked if they would be willing to integrate Beth during her grade 6 year so that by high school she would know the kids and they said yes. They said that that’s what they do with the kids coming into prep so more than likely they would do the same with high school. The kids in Beth’s year level will be there too so I can get a feel for how she feels about it. I’ll let you know how we go.



Posted by Sarah on May 25, 2010 in Uncategorized

Yesterday was meant to be Beth’s swimming lesson. I did work in Bridie’s classroom from 2 til 3 then went up early to get Beth from her classroom as we have a book fair on this week and I told her she could choose a book before we set off for swimming. Of course me being me, we ended up with 5 or 6 books! I do like to encourage my kids to read and some of them will make excellent readers.

(Please note that from this point on for privacy reasons I will not be referring to the staff at our school by their names at all, simply by the their role in Beth’s educational life.)

Beth was doing fractions with her teacher and aide when I went to pick her up which was a shame as I didn’t really like to interrupt,  she seemed to be doing quite well. Anyway off we trotted to get our books and then out to our car. When she got in Beth asked me where her books were. I handed them in the door to her and before I got the chance to get my arm out Beth had slammed the door shut hard onto my hand. I think it was a delayed reaction as I stated to her that mummy’s hand was in the door and she’d shut it while it was still there, then I started to feel all faint. Luckily Paul was there as he picks the kids up for me on a Monday, so he came to see what was wrong. I ended up sitting with my head between my knees while one of the lovely mums got me an ice pack and a drink of water and poor old Paul stood in the rain checking on me!

Beth had done the right thing and apologized but by now she was getting pissed off that we weren’t hurrying up and getting to swimming. She tried convincing me that she could go with Dad and I could take the other kids home but as I was feeling so faint and not knowing if my hand was ok or not I didn’t think I could drive home. I felt awful as she doesn’t like many things and desperately wanted to go to her swimming lesson but there was no way it could happen. In the end I sat in the back with Bill and Bridie and Paul drove my car home. Prue kindly came to pick him up and took him back to get his own car and poor old Bethie Boo had to miss out on her swimming lesson.

I must say all the kids were very good. I went off to bed (I don’t handle pain very well) and they kept coming in to check on me. Bridie wanted to play games but kept devising ones that wouldn’t involve me hand. I don’t know whether Beth had any guilt about the fact that she had been the one who hurt me, but she was equally as concerned that my hand was hurt and kept checking on me and asking if I was alright which was good enough for me. She didn’t do it on purpose, I know that, but, as those of you with autistic kids would get, she had one focus in mind and it was to shut the door. My hand isn’t normally there so why would it be there then? Beth seemed genuinely surprised that my hand was hurt and I wonder if I hadn’t brought it to her attention if she would have differentuated between my hand and the seat belt buckle stopping the door from shutting, it was just an obstacle that got in her way. I don’t mean that in a cruel way, it’s just the way it is. Where other kids would cry out and apologize straight away, Beth needs it explained to her.

When she got up this morning the first thing she asked was if my hand was ok, as did Bill and Bridie so what more can I expect, she’s still showing me that she cares. I’m very lucky in that sense, I know there are some kids that don’t know how to show their feelings or to show any empathy towards another. It’s taken a while to get to this stage but it’s so worth it in the end. Oh and by the way, my hand is fine, just a little swollen.


Hags do Healesville

Posted by Sarah on May 24, 2010 in Uncategorized

What a fabulous weekend I’ve had. We hags (happy autism group support for those of you not in the know) went to Healesville for Saturday night and had a fantastic time. Amanda picked me up just before 10am on Saturday and after picking up Gwenny we headed off to Healesville. We booked in at the wonderful Bed and Breakfast – Tuck Inn – which I can highly recommend to anybody that might be thinking of going to Healesville for any reason. We then lunched at the Healesville Hotel. Clare met us there along with Margaret, Nicky and Dominique who came along just for the lunch. They all left about 3 so we went back to the Tuck Inn to get our bathers and drove out to the Piaf Day Spa for massages and other yummy treatments, followed by a spa.

We all felt a bit decadent as the treatments were something that we as mums don’t generally get a chance to do. It was in a beautiful setting in the trees. The treatment rooms were so serene and as Amanda pointed out it was like being in a James Bond movie, the girls pampering us walked so quietly that we almost jumped each time they came back to us. Amanda, Gwenny and I were in 1 room and Clare was in another. Both Amanda and Gwen had some hot rocks and at times the only sound was them clicking together. I lay there laughing to myself as the sound took me back years to when I was single and a drinker, it sounded like pool balls clicking together!

After our treatments we popped into the local Thai restaurant then went back to the Bed and Breakfast for cups of tea and choccy. We didn’t get to bed until 2am, we never seem to run out of things to say to each other and we wanted to make the most of our time. In the morning we all had a cooked breakfast and made the most of the fact that they had a cappuccino machine. We then went for a stroll along the shops with me spending all my money on presents for the kids instead of things for me as planned. The only bugger was that the markets weren’t on but if we go again next year we agreed that we would make it on a market weekend. I think we’ll get a few more people next year too. It was my friend Tiff (the art teacher) who suggested going there as she goes with a group of friends every year and they book the whole place out. Hopefully we can do the same next year.

Amanda dropped me home at about 2pm and Paul was round as his mum and dads with the kids. I knew they were there as Minka wasn’t at home, so I collapsed in a heap, enjoying the last bit of me time before the troups arrived. The house was a pigsty but then again it was before I left too! They had had a camp out on Saturday night so Beth’s double mattress and Bridie’s single one covered the loungeroom floor. Bridie had been to a party that Sunday morning so Paul had dropped the other kids over to Bev and John’s in the morning and they had taken them to church with them. 

Originally when Paul had started sailing I had told him that he would have to let his friend know that on the 22nd I was going away so he couldn’t go. I insisted that he was the one who had to take the kids swimming as I have to do it every week when he’s sailing so he couldn’t palm them off to his parents. In the end though I just thought “who cares, I wont be there anyway so it’s up to him how he deals with it.” He did in fact take them swimming and had a grand old time with them but either way, as long as I got my break I was satisfied.

I must say I was happy to see the kids when I got home. I love staying in hotels but as usually if we go away with the kids I have one or two in the bed with me I felt a pang of longing lying in this strange bed without them. I wont say that I thought about them constantly as I loved every minute of my time away but I think I was more excited about buying their presents as I was looking for myself. They all ran into my arms when they came in the door, partly I’m sure to see what I bought them but also because we don’t spend much time apart except for school. The only time I’ve been away without them is the same time last year when the HAGS went to the city for our night away, so it’s been a whole year. We have had nights if we’ve been out when the kids have stayed with Bev and John but we’re always there early to pick them up and we’ve slept at home. I love it when Beth tells me she misses me or that she loves me, not that I love her more than the others or anything like that but just because it doesn’t come naturally to her. Yesterday she said these things, not in response to me saying them but spontaneously which made it mean so much more. I absolutely needed my break and deserved it too but being at home with my babes is even more wonderful after a break. I wouldn’t trade that for anything.


An excellent session

Posted by Sarah on May 21, 2010 in Uncategorized

We had Sensational Kids yesterday and Beth had a fantastic session with Rod. We have now ceased Occupational Therapy as for some reason the budget has decided that Medicare will now not be allowing psychological based Occupational Therapy to be claimed under the Mental Health structure. It used to be that you could get 12 visits per calendar year and in some cases 18 visits subsidised by medicare. As we always found speech to be an absolute necessity for Beth we did Occupational Therapy in conjunction as we could claim back a large chunk of this. We never found it to be as beneficial though as speech clearly had been. Now that it’s not claimable we decided that we would just concentrate on speech therapy.

Rod brought it a white board to yesterdays session and pretending to design and order a pizza with Beth with her doing the main bit of the work. She had to tell Rod the phone numbers and tell him what had to be on the pizza. I filmed quite a bit of this as it always fascinates me how Rod gets Beth’s mind working. Most of it is on the film but I got a phone call near the end. Rod had got to the stage that they had called for the pizza but they said it would be 3 hours as they had run out of onions. Rod said they had devised a solution where they would pay the greengrocer $100 to deliver the onions in a helicopter, therefore solving the problem. It was a great exercise as Beth had to sequence the ingredients even though they weren’t written in order. For example there were onions and apples, ham and cheese and tomato sauce. She figured out that the tomato goes on the bottom, then some cheese etc etc. Rod was always querying what sort of cheese and types of apples were wanted and Beth took to it all really well.

Next we played a game where I had to pick a picture out of a pack (blindly) and Beth had to write a sentence on the board of what the picture said. Once again she found this pretty easy such as “there was a boy walking up the stairs” or The boy is hearing with his ear.” It was a good change from her “Once upon a time” stories. She had one where there were two similar pictures, both of the same boy in bed but one was asleep and the other was awake. Rod pointed out that there were two similar pictures and Beth had to make the story different so I’d know which one it was. She wrote “The boy is sleeping in his bed.” I was really pleased with how this game went. I must remember to not ask direct questions though, rather, make suggestive movements or use words like “and” to get her to elaborate. If I just fire questions at her then she doesn’t have to think about her answer as I’ve given it to her.

I’m going away tomorrow for a HAGS night away. We went last May too, into town for the night and to a swish restaurant for dinner. This time we’re off to Healesville for lunch at the pub which has been on one of those Victorian travel shows and has a fabulous reputation. Then we’re off to a pamper place for contour wraps and massages then out for dinner to who knows where! We’re staying in a Bed and Breakfast overnight and hopefully after brekky will check out some markets before coming home. I can’t wait, I love a bit of pampering at the best of times. I’ll put some photos on here when I get back. Toodleooo xxx


A pretty good weekend

Posted by Sarah on May 17, 2010 in Uncategorized

Beth has her photo face on here

We’ve had a nice weekend. Saturday Bridie had swimming and Paul couldn’t go sailing as there was no wind so he stayed home with the other kids. I picked up Bev and John as Bridie wanted them to watch so we ended up all going back to their house for lunch and the afternoon. Beth has a little routine when she goes around to Bev and John’s. First she has a wobble on the big concrete paver that is loose just inside the garage door that you take to get into the backyard. We have to try and file in past her as she does this cos she likes the whole surfing movement of it. She then either races off through the house to go on Grandpa’s computer or chucks off her shoes and jacket, flinging them where-ever, and jumps on to the trampoline. She’s quite amazing on the trampoline as when she is walking she is quite clumsy (I think she gets this from me) but when on the trampoline she is really coordinated and has never fallen off. She is starting to worry me a bit though as she likes to fling herself back onto her back and has nearly hit her head a couple of times as she is nearly as tall as me. We have told her numerous times, however I think it’s probably one of those things that until she does it she wont stop. And even then she would probably do it again.

At times Beth scares me with the fact that she has a knowledge of things that are dangerous but doesn’t put them into practice. The other night she was playing with those things, I think they’re called scoobiedoos. They’re pains in the arse as they’re like a strip of spaghetti but a plastic string. We have hundreds of them and you’re meant to tie them up to make jewellery. Beth pulled out a safety plug in an electricity point and stuck one of them in. She then turned it on. It didn’t do any harm because it is just plastic but she didn’t know that. When you catch her out doing something like this she says sorry straight away so she knows that she shouldn’t do it but she still does it anyway.

Paul’s Uncle Frank came down from Ballarat on Saturday so the kids spent the afternoon looking out of the window for his train. Bev and John live opposite the train station so we see the trains pulling in and the passengers walking down the link to the underground part which goes right under Burwood Highway and opposite their house. Due to problems with the trains (yes I know, unheard of) Frank was late and the kids got jack of waiting and looking. But we still knew when he was arriving. Good old Minka the Wonderdog started barking. We looked out the window and the train had only just started leaving the station so Frank was not far off it, in fact a few minutes passed before we saw him coming up from the underpath. Dogs are amazing aren’t they. I guess she’s seen Frank quite a lot but the fact that she knew it was him coming was just astounding.

We went to the local pub Micawbers for lunch yesterday as it was Frank’s birthday. I always feel quite proud as I do have generally well behaved kids when in public. Beth did start to get a bit bored while we waited for what seemed an eternity to get our meals. I did the politically incorrect thing and let her take her DSi with her but it was better than chasing her around the place. They wore their irish gear that Grandma and Grandpa brought them back. In fact Beth’s was probably Austrian as she looked like heidi! Bill had an Irish cap on which really suits him and Brides had on a pretty red dress. All in all it was a good weekend.


A fairly quiet week

Posted by Sarah on May 14, 2010 in Uncategorized

We’ve had a pretty non eventful week. After our big drama earlier in the week it’s been the usual family stuff.

The melatonin seems to be working quite well still but of course it isn’t a miracle cure. If I don’t make sure that Beth is keeping herself quiet and trying to wake herself up then there’s no point. I think at school they’re a bit worried as a few of us have tried our kids on it in the last week or so and have been all over the place behaviourally. Bec had tried Will on it from last weekend and it had certainly helped him to be quieter at night before going to sleep. At school though he’s been quite out of control. When she mentioned the melatonin she was asked if any of the other kids were on it too. When Bec replied yes I think that staff thought that could explain their behaviour but Beth was being ratty for a good few days before we even started on it. One of the reasons why we tried it in the first place was because she was being so bad that I put it down to her being overtired from not sleeping. It is a natural melatonin too, not the one that needs to be prescribed by a doctor so there’s no harm in it. I even checked it with our doctor and neither he nor the chemist gave me any indication that it could cause anything bad. There’s not even anything on the bottle that talks about side effects. Time will tell I guess.

Beth had a party day at school today as her year level did the Naplan testing this week. She didn’t do it as we figured that she would be doing grade 5 again next year anyway.  She had to take a pillow and some chips to share to watch a movie with.

All the kids went off today dressed up. They had to dress as somebody they want to be when they grow up. Bill was easy as he wants to be a karate instructor so wore his ghee. Bridie wants to be a hairdresser but we settled for a fairy princess as I didn’t think scissors would go down too well. Beth ended up going as a rock chic. She wanted to go as Marge Simpson but as she only told me last night I had no idea how to make the big hair. She has a Pink t shirt so she wore that with jeans and her multicoloured wig that she got for her birthday. I realised that she had outgrown her boots but figured as now she’s in size 9’s that she could just wear some of mine. They look heaps better on her than me!

I’ve had a slack day. Tiff the art teacher is away so Bree and Prue came over and we did art this morning. We then decided to go out for lunch so I’ve popped home quickly to write this before I’m back off for school pickup. At least then I can feel like I’ve done something productive!

Have a good weekend everybody. We don’t have anything planned so I probably wont speak to you again til Monday. xxxxx


False alarm thank goodness

Posted by Sarah on May 12, 2010 in Uncategorized

What a night I had last night. Yesterday was a bit stressful for me because I went to the doctors to ask about what we can do with Bridie’s selective mutism. It seems to be getting worse as does her anxiety. I spoke to our Principal about it at school and she’s getting the psychologist to come and assess her but I think I need to get some outside help also. Mark (the doctor) gave me some names of clinical psychologists who have dealt with selective mutism and anxiety in children so I think we’ll book in to see one of them. He said we need some sort of diagnosis to see exactly what the root cause is. I hate the word diagnosis. It’s not like it will make her a different person if she has one but I don’t want a label if she doesn’t need one. I feel bad too because I have always looked at her and thought how she’s nothing like Beth, therefore she’ll be ok but of course they are different kids anyway with different personalities and issues.  Beth had selective mutism quite severely until she started school. Bill also didn’t talk through his 3 year old kinder year so I thought Bridie would grow out of it like Bill did.I feel we need to get on top of it sooner rather than later as she started off the school year well and has regressed somewhat since then in my opinion. On the plus side though a couple of the staff members have told me that she has spoken to them which is fantastic.

I called one of the psychologists who told me surprisingly that selective mutism and autism are not linked. Donna Williams has written a book about Exposure Anxiety which discusses selective mutism so I thought that that had been part of Beth’s autism when she wasn’t verbal. Now I wonder if it was a different thing all together. Of course children with autism experience issues to the extremes so Beth’s was probably more severe due to her autism.

Last night when Beth went to put her pyjamas on I noticed a bit of blood on her knickers. I’ve spoken to her about getting her period and she’s always shut me down with the “I want to be a powerpuff girl” response. She absolutely freaked when I tried to talk about it with her last night. It was horrible, it made me realise how completely unprepared I was for it. She refused to pull her pyjama pants down so that I could put knickers on her and kept trying to break away from me. I showed her a pad and placed it in the knickers to show her that it didn’t hurt but it made no difference, she kept taking it out and throwing it away. I was trying to find the book with the social stories in to talk to her about it but each time I left the room she’d take it off again. In the end I showed her a book that my friend Dominique had lent me about changing a pad. She sat with me in my arms and I read her other stories and every once in a while she would wimper “I don’t want my period”. It’s heartbreaking as there’s nothing I could say but “I know darling, neither do I” as it is a horrible thing but unfortunately it’s just life. She slept in bed with me for the night and when I checked this morning it was at least still there though it was clean. I think she had in fact scratched herself a bit. I need to organise myself more for this as it’s going to happen soon and neither of us are prepared for how much it’ll effect us both. I’m trying to think of something non breakable that I can buy her that’s special just because she’s getting her period, maybe a nice charm necklace on a leather strap. It was an awful night and we were both shaking with the verocity of her trying to fight me off and wanting so much for this thing not to happen. I’m so glad it really wasn’t but I’m dreading the time that it’s for real.


With the good comes the bad

Posted by Sarah on May 10, 2010 in Uncategorized

Beth has been amazing with her communication these days, I couldn’t be happier with it. Unfortunately that means that she can express herself more clearly when she’s not happy about something too. As you know I believe she is going through puberty which means that she’s pretty moody and downright horrid at times at the moment.

I went up to the office to sign Beth out for her swimming lessons this afternoon and the principal came to me. She wanted me to know that Beth had pushed her aide that afternoon. It hadn’t been too hard but Beth’s teacher had put a stop to it. I’m not sure of the exact circumstances. The principal had noticed that Beth had pushed me a bit when coming down some steps last week, something that I’d forgotten about. In my case I know it wasn’t anything malicious though probably deliberate as she did want me out of the way. When I say deliberate I don’t mean that she meant to hurt me but that it was a means to an end. Anyway, The principal had seen it and after the incident today she was concerned about the fact that Beth was being too physical. I agree and have now had words with Beth about it not being appropriate. I’ve always prided myself on the fact that Beth isn’t violent in any way so am disappointed in this turn of events. I still don’t believe that she would deliberately hurt anybody though. When I went into the classroom Beth was playing a game with the two aides. I made a point at telling her how I wasn’t happy about what had happened. Beth’s response was “I’ve already apologized for that mum.” I had to stop myself showing my pleasure with her answer. Once upon a time she would have sullenly said “sorry” in a way that meant that truth be told she couldn’t really give a shit and wanted out of the conversation. Instead she had listened to what I had said and made the appropriate response. I am so used to praising her for something like this but instead I had to remain stern and explain that I was glad that she had but that it still shouldn’t have happened.

As we were leaving Bree told me that when she had dropped Nimi off that morning Beth had been on the computer and when asked to join the rest of the class had told her aide to go away. Once again, I’m pleased that she can express herself correctly but not that she is being rude about it. She pushed the boundaries at the pool too. Her teacher Caprice is fabulous with her, just the right combination of humour and seriousness. Beth repeats what Caprice says a lot but at least we know it’s going in. Caprice doesn’t take any of her bullshit either which is perfect for Beth as she likes to play people along. 

Near the end of her lesson Beth saw me chatting to my friend Nicole. Afterwards she asked me “who was that lady you were talking to mum?” A perfectly normal sentence I know but one that wouldn’t have come out sounding so normal not that long ago.

I guess that others with kids Beth’s age or a bit older are going through this vile stage also, it’s not just special for special kids. I suppose it’s harder in the fact that other kids understand personal space and how to control their emotions better, especially around others that aren’t in their family. The thing I love about Beth, the unselfconscious behaviour and the being herself around others can also be the most frustrating thing about her as sometimes it’s just wrong. Hopefully as she does become more aware of herself she can learn to control it better.


A lovely mothers day

Posted by Sarah on May 10, 2010 in Uncategorized

We’ve had a very nice weekend. Friday night Paul took the kids mothers day shopping so I had a little break. We brought the guinea pigs home from prep for the weekend so Bridie was in a good mood for a change too. And surprise surprise, they survived the weekend at camp O’Connor, even being carried around by the 2 girls for most of it!

Saturday Bridie had swimming lessons (she’s bloody good too) then we went off to Bec’s for the afternoon. Bill and Will were going to a party so the girls and I chilled with Bec and Kasey at their house. We ended up staying for dinner so all in all it was a lovely afternoon. Paul was off sailing and got home to find an empty house.

Sunday was lovely. A belated Happy Mothers Day to all you very important mums out there. Beth was amazingly the first one to come in and give me her present. She didn’t even have to be asked so it was really touching. Of course the kids chose presents that they liked for themselves. Beth had picked me out a vase with chocolates in the bottom and Bridie had picked me a bath pack, then insisted on having a bath straight after giving it to me! Bill had picked a travel mug. All of these were from the mothers day stall at school. At the shops they had bought me a lovely cosy dressing gown and a huge box of favourites chocolates. Bridie picked these as she prefers them to my favourite which is Lindt. I got my bacon and eggs in bed and got to read the paper. I must admit I am spoilt as Paul does cook bacon and eggs every Sunday but I got to go first yesterday! The kids helped too with popping the toast down and carrying it all in to me.

Later on in the afternoon Bridie and Bill gave me a leg massage, asking if I liked it slow and squishy or fast and rubby. We decided on slow and squishy. I ate so much crap that today I am declaring the first day of my diet. Watch this space, I figure if I name my weight I might be shamed into losing it all! 91kg! Never again. I’ll keep you posted of my progress. This morning at Pilates I felt dreadful but I wasn’t the only one so I think we all overindulged yesterday. My problem is that I overindulge every day! I just hate how much I love food. I gave up drinking on my 40th and smoking when I was 35, food’s all I have left! Never mind, I have to look good for the talk show circuits when my book is published. Isn’t that what they say – put it out there? That’s what they say on the secret anyway!

By the way, I have a new best friend – Mel. Melatonin that is! I love the stuff, Beth has been going to sleep by 10 every night, absolute bliss. She’s calm before hand and then just drifts off. She’s been so much nicer with it too cos she’s sleeping so well. I’ve been noticing lately how well she and Bridie interact at times. Bill has always been a lovely child and plays nicely (most of the time) with both of his sisters but Bridie seems to be taking on a lovely caring attitude towards Beth. When we had the guinea pigs here she’d get one out for Beth and show her the right way to hold them. It’s so sweet to see. Paul mentioned how it worked the other way too. On pizza night he takes the girls to pick up the pizzas and he said that last week Bridie was stuffing around pretending to go out onto the road. Beth called to her and told her that it was dangerous to go out onto the road as she may get hit by a car. He said she grabbed Bridie’s hand and wouldn’t let go! I was so proud of her. She’s really coming along so well lately.

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