I went to the ASD clinic in Kew this morning. Those who read my blog regularly know that I’ve been petrified of the whole adult thing with Beth. I almost pretend in my mind that it’s not happening as it’s such a scary prospect. But, as you know, things have come to a head lately and it’s time to get my head out of the sand and to admit that she is growing up and that I need to be ready for school finishing and either other training or working happening. Oh My God!
I look up Richard Eisenmajer because I have been to see him talk and I find him amazing. He works with adults on the spectrum and I thought it was about time that I dealt with Beth’s issues as a 17 year old going on to adulthood. If I am going to develop a working relationship with myself, Beth and a professional I don’t want it to have to be cut short when she reaches 18. I saw Laura Addabbo. I was so impressed with her. She just ‘got’ our issues. When speaking about things such as Beth’s organisational skills (she basically doesn’t have many) or her ‘I am a queen’ attitude Laura nodded and said that’s really common for people on the spectrum. She said that they need motivation, if there’s nothing in it for them then why would they bother doing it. That is soooo Beth! I was explaining about teaching her to do things such as folding towels, a pretty easy task. She hates it. And all the other things I am getting her to do. Again, if there’s nothing in it for her, why bother.
We discussed her attitude at school. About how there needs to be a link in with me so that behaviours are rewarded with the things she wants at home. The teacher she has this year is very open to me being told if Beth’s behaviour is bad, so that Beth knows that the consequences will be followed through with. But instead of doing the negative as in losing tablet privileges, make it positive such as a sticker chart or money to go towards a magazine at the end of her week. And of course when she said this I said inside ‘bloody hell, I knew that, that positive consequences work better than negative, why haven’t I been doing that?!’
We’ve also booked in to see a new paediatrician in Camberwell. Mainly because they have been recommended as knowing what they are doing with ASD kids and they come recommended. As far as Beth’s medication is concerned it was suggested that I see a new paed before she turns 18 to talk about her medication. She hasn’t had a review for a couple of years, there is room to move as far as amount and type is concerned. And, as Laura pointed out, Beth’s sensory issues could be worse if her medication isn’t at the right dose now. I’ve made an appointment for next Monday for us.
I’m already dreading tomorrow morning. Beth went next door to my inlaws house while I went to the first session with Laura. I went to pick her up and Bev (my mother in law) told me that Beth is complaining of having a sore throat and a tummy ache. I’ve told Beth that that’s not the way it’s meant to work, that she has to go willingly on the days she is going or we’ll have to do something else. That we’ve already got Wednesday off this week for our family trip to see Sound of Music on stage. The reality is though that she is the way she is and she can’t help how she feels. I will have a meeting with her school about not only the positive rewards but about the behaviours that we will be rewarding, such as leaving that boy alone that she has an issue with. I think I’ll also do a social story to try and help it along. Who knows though, it may be too late.
Anyway, I’m feeling much more positive this week. Even though I pooped myself driving on the Eastern Freeway! I feel as though we are moving forward slowly, and we have a direction to go in. Let’s hope it’s a positive new start. Hopefully if I can get things a little sorted, she’ll be all ready to start her transitioning to her future by the time she turns 18.
