We’re off to see Richard Malter again today so wish us luck! Beth’s been having the flaxseed this time around for 5 weeks. Last time it was for 3 weeks and he said that the virus was 2/5 gone so let’s see how we go. I’m looking forward to the next phase which is supposed to help her gut. Beth has always been a very pale child and has dark circles under her eyes. She also has to go to the toilet often with the runs so this should help clear all those gut problems out. I think that’s when we’ll start seeing changes, at least in mood, because she’s never known what it’s like to not have this.
We’ve had a pretty good week so far. Beth had swimming lessons on Monday and was very good for Debbie. I decided to implement the reward system instead of the punishment system in regards to her handstands. I told Beth that she could have an icecream after her lesson if she promised not to do any handstands. It was ok if Debbie said she could or if it was as a reward for swimming a good lap but other than that she was not to do any. There was a couple of times when she went to do it but self corrected herself so all in all she did really well. It’s amazing when a strategy that you’ve been taught actually does work! In all the books on parenting they say that talking of punishment focuses on the negative whereas to talk of reward focuses on the positive. I know it’s true but of course sometimes you’re at your wits end and it’s not always that easy. And there is satisfaction (horrible mum) in punishment at times when you’re feeling so frustrated or angry that you just want to lash out and say “that’s it, no more such and such” but generally it doesn’t work. I wish that I could say that this is how I always parent but of course I am only human!
Something else that Beth has been doing has been very clever but very cheeky. She’s always done this to an extent but is now pushing the boundaries or more to the point pushing me to the limits that I know she likes to do! She’ll make out that she doesn’t know how dangerous something is and pretend she’s doing it. An example of this was when I picked the kids up from school the other day. Beth went and sat in the car and found one of those freshness sachets that come in so many things, you know the little white ones that have “do not ingest” or something like that written on them. It must have come out of something that we’d opened in the car and anybody who knows me and my family will know that my car is generally a little messy (a slight underexaggeration there!) Anyway, I get in the car and there is Beth holding this sachet up over her open mouth as though she’s going to drop it in. Of course I went off at her and she settled back in her seat to have a wee giggle to herself! Now if I hadn’t noticed her doing it she would have asked me something like “what does ingest mean Mum?” or “what would happen if I swallowed this Mum?” just to get the point across that she supposedly didn’t know it was dangerous and wanted me to know that. Don’t underestimate the mind of your child, they’re often a lot smarter than we give them credit for.
When I think about it Beth has often done things like this that she knows will get me riled up. She went through a smashing plates and glasses phase for a while there which was fun. She loved the noises it made and I was just glad that she didn’t realise how spectacular it would be to smash a television! She was about 4 or 5 at this stage. Often though it wouldn’t be until I came into the room that the plates would break, she’d stand there with them in her hand quietly then when she spied me out of the corner of her eye she’d let them go. Similarly she’d do this with eggs at Bev and John’s house, going into the fridge and getting the eggs out then waiting for us to come and see what she was up to. Then she’d drop them and laugh to herself at our reaction. I’m so pleased that I’m entertaining to my child!