With the good comes the bad

Beth has been amazing with her communication these days, I couldn’t be happier with it. Unfortunately that means that she can express herself more clearly when she’s not happy about something too. As you know I believe she is going through puberty which means that she’s pretty moody and downright horrid at times at the moment.

I went up to the office to sign Beth out for her swimming lessons this afternoon and the principal came to me. She wanted me to know that Beth had pushed her aide that afternoon. It hadn’t been too hard but Beth’s teacher had put a stop to it. I’m not sure of the exact circumstances. The principal had noticed that Beth had pushed me a bit when coming down some steps last week, something that I’d forgotten about. In my case I know it wasn’t anything malicious though probably deliberate as she did want me out of the way. When I say deliberate I don’t mean that she meant to hurt me but that it was a means to an end. Anyway, The principal had seen it and after the incident today she was concerned about the fact that Beth was being too physical. I agree and have now had words with Beth about it not being appropriate. I’ve always prided myself on the fact that Beth isn’t violent in any way so am disappointed in this turn of events. I still don’t believe that she would deliberately hurt anybody though. When I went into the classroom Beth was playing a game with the two aides. I made a point at telling her how I wasn’t happy about what had happened. Beth’s response was “I’ve already apologized for that mum.” I had to stop myself showing my pleasure with her answer. Once upon a time she would have sullenly said “sorry” in a way that meant that truth be told she couldn’t really give a shit and wanted out of the conversation. Instead she had listened to what I had said and made the appropriate response. I am so used to praising her for something like this but instead I had to remain stern and explain that I was glad that she had but that it still shouldn’t have happened.

As we were leaving Bree told me that when she had dropped Nimi off that morning Beth had been on the computer and when asked to join the rest of the class had told her aide to go away. Once again, I’m pleased that she can express herself correctly but not that she is being rude about it. She pushed the boundaries at the pool too. Her teacher Caprice is fabulous with her, just the right combination of humour and seriousness. Beth repeats what Caprice says a lot but at least we know it’s going in. Caprice doesn’t take any of her bullshit either which is perfect for Beth as she likes to play people along. 

Near the end of her lesson Beth saw me chatting to my friend Nicole. Afterwards she asked me “who was that lady you were talking to mum?” A perfectly normal sentence I know but one that wouldn’t have come out sounding so normal not that long ago.

I guess that others with kids Beth’s age or a bit older are going through this vile stage also, it’s not just special for special kids. I suppose it’s harder in the fact that other kids understand personal space and how to control their emotions better, especially around others that aren’t in their family. The thing I love about Beth, the unselfconscious behaviour and the being herself around others can also be the most frustrating thing about her as sometimes it’s just wrong. Hopefully as she does become more aware of herself she can learn to control it better.

About Sarah

Mother of an autistic child wanting to write about my personal experiences
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2 Responses to With the good comes the bad

  1. Nicole says:

    I did noticed how Beth stood quietly and allowed us to finish our conversation. Well done Beth, lovely manners.

  2. Sarah says:

    thanks Nic, it’s always nice when somebody else notices too!

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