Nothing to report

We’ve had a fairly quiet school holidays so far. The week that Paul was away ended up being much more relaxed than I anticipated. We spend several days at home because the weather was so ridiculously hot, since then the weather’s been fairly crappy, not like summer at all, but I guess that’s what we get living in Melbourne. We all enjoyed the break from doing anything much and spent lots of time watching dvds, reading books and having pyjama days. We had a friend’s son Jose over one day for the day while his mum Cat worked. Jose has aspergers and is 14. Beth quite fancies him and says movie type things such as “Sweet, sweet Jose” when I mention him. He’s a lovely kid and the boys had a good time but it was very intense. They were watching cricket and Jose was yelling at the tely. Similarly when they played a game on the wii that Jose took a while to master, he would yell his disappointment and get Bill to do the hard bits. He didn’t do it in a horrible way at all but it was fairly full on. It was interesting to see my quiet boy adapt to suit this sports loving 14 year old. He loves Jose as any 10 year old boy would and was happy to do what Jose wanted. I did have to pull Jose up a couple of times when Bill was adjusting the volume on the tv or racing to their next activity but I knew Jose wasn’t being bossy to be mean and they seemed happy enough. I asked Bill a couple of times if he was ok and he said yes. I am so conscious that, as I have made friends with many people with kids on the spectrum, this in turn puts my children with their’s whether they choose this or not. As it’s more common for boys to be on the spectrum than girls it usually ends up being Bill who plays with them. Girls also tend to do their own thing. This may be a huge generalization but in our case Beth is happy in her own pursuits. Boys tend to play in packs, even if it’s side by side on a computer game. Anyway, Bill does love the friends that he’s made and it’s certainly made for a lovely natured boy, always happy to play with the kids a little different, almost always tolerant and generally an all round good kid. At least if I’m aware if it gets too much, and if he’s happy, then all is well.

We went for a play to Bec’s house in that week too, always fun as all the kids play so nicely. Beth watches her videos, Bill runs along with Will (and sometimes after him) and Bridie and Kasey put on huge productions for Bec and I! Angus (Bec’s toddler) joins in with everything and Bec and I sit and chat, for hours at a time. Bree turned up in the afternoon, bringing Aullin to play with the girls. We were just missing Liz from our motley crew of four but we are planning a catch up again this week.

Paul came home last Sunday morning. I was surprised how well we coped without him. I think that when you’re not expecting somebody home at night your mind set is different, you can’t afford to get stressed and think “Where is he?” so you cope because you have to. Sunday was awash as Paul caught a flight at 11pm on Saturday, flying to Melbourne and losing three hours, he got no sleep so spent Sunday grumpy and falling asleep everywhere. Needless to say I was not sympathetic! The kids were happy to see him. I think Beth found it confusing for Paul to be away with her stating when he called “Dad, you’re alive!” I don’t know what she was really thinking, surely she wasn’t really thinking the worst? I’m not sure if we should be worried that she really thought that Paul was dead, or be worried that she really didn’t seem that worried about it! Bridie made a huge sign for him that said We missed you. She also made him a card that she made the other kids write on. Out of all the kids Bridie is by far my most difficult and also my most lovable. She loves to pamper us and really just wants to have our full attention.

We had another playdate with Cat and Jose this week and organised for our family to go with theirs to Inverloch for a few days the week after next. I had a road trip to IKEA with my mother in law Bev. I love that place! I had bought the expedit shelves that are 16 squares so wanted some boxes for them. I want some more shelves now, I’m a bit obsessed. I’ve even ordered my new phone (my contract is up) with a free xbox and kinect so that I can sell them when they come and buy another shelving unit. We can’t really afford them at this stage so I figure as I’ve sacrificed getting a smart phone for a crappier one I can get my shelves with the proceeds.

We’re going to the drive in tonight to see The Muppets. Beth has been asking when she can go to the movies with her friends from school but I think they’re away. I’ll have to send them an email. I think school ending has hit her worse than I thought as she was distressed last night telling me she was missing her friends. She knows she wont be with them this year and as she hasn’t made new friends yet it’s heartbreaking to see her feeling like this. They are her safe place as far as social interactions go, they like her for who she is and she knows they’re not going to be mean to her. I hope she makes friends soon at the new school. Still, it’s good to see that friendships are important to her, that she wants them so badly. Poor love, high school’s horrible enough without the added anxieties that our kids have.

About Sarah

Mother of an autistic child wanting to write about my personal experiences
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